SI Teacher Inquiry Essay

Engagement, The Holy Grail

                It wasn’t hard to come to my topic and research question. I got there fast, but then changed multiple times. If anything I found myself regretting the questions I didn’t follow, and every day I find myself becoming more and more convinced that the questions that I couldn’t explore will not disappear.

                All of my questions and many of our questions have revolved around what I see as the holy grail of engagement. How many of the issues that disrupt my classroom really boil down to a lack of engagement? What could my classes accomplish if they cared and understood the purpose in everything we do? A student’s reluctance to discuss heady issues might have to do with my classroom climate or my particular techniques, but I’ve had great discussions in classes that I didn’t feel that I had established a great classroom climate nor had I looked for or used particularly special techniques. I’m looking at many of these TIW’s and thinking that this is what we’re truly after.

                I know my strengths and I play to them as much as possible. But I’m also keenly aware of my weaknesses. When the frantic end to the year dissipated and I found myself with time to really dig into my workshop, I realized that the original passion I’d felt for my topic was missing.

                I’d wanted to spend my time examining what literacy meant. My district has been implementing changes based on a perceived need for better literacy. Our kids can’t read, and we have to go into emergency mode to fix it. My problem has been that the measures seem skewed and disagree with both anecdotal and academic evidence I have. Part of my passion had a pin put in it by the fact that my school district listened to my and the reading teachers’ concerns and are working this summer to implement many of the changes we suggested. The other part melted away when I began examining the research on reading and reading tests. Clearly this was a question for doctoral research.

So, what then? I channeled Dylan’s mellow voice, “Find your stuck place…” he purred. Where am I stuck? A wave washed over me – faces of students, their questions ringing in my ears, colleagues weary faces as I watch them burning out – so many stuck places. I’m stuck wondering how to lead from a non-administrative position. I’m stuck wondering how to save a great colleague who is allowing anxiety and negativity to pull him closer and closer to the abyss of burn-out. I’m stuck trying to find a way to connect my classroom and my school to its community. I’m stuck trying to find ways to bring my students along with me to the places I want to take them. I'm stuck trying to figure out how to make sure that I don’t joke myself out of ever being taken seriously.

Now I’m stuck being stuck.

There’s Dylan again, “Something you want to overcome, a place that you want to look closely at to find a way through or around or over it.” What can I control? I can only control my behaviors. I can’t make sure they’re fed or loved or nurtured or encouraged, but I can ensure that when they walk into my classroom I’ve spent the right amount of time and effort in preparation to engage them.

My question revolved around using philosophical inquiry as the fuel for discussion in my class. I had three particular students in mind as I wrote and researched and presented. Victoria was absorbed entirely in grades. She was blunt and clear in that she saw value from my class in its placement on her resume and the A she had damn well better earn. Heather had nothing but distaste for teachers – all teachers. Her sighing and eye rolling was always centered on how asinine my questions had to be, how I couldn’t possibly have a point to what I’m asking, how she was on to my schtick, and I needed to give it up. Jasmine was the most upsetting: a smart, kind, eager student her sophomore year who had soured on her classmates. Their comments were met with non-verbal derision – some of which prompted harsh reaction from me.

What I realize was missing from them is really buy-in and connection. Engagement. Maybe philosophical inquiry will help, but so might incorporating technology, using creative writing techniques, connecting writing to professional fields the students are deeply interested in, examining the constraints and choice of genre, and engaging students in direct investigation of grammar through the use of exemplar texts. 

I didn’t find all the answers. I’m still trying to narrow the possibilities of where the answers might come from. But I think that I’m learning every day. I’m intrigued by the idea of varied methods of expression helping to get students engaged in deep critical thinking. My students write mirror poetry when responding to literature, but I think that their desire to create might be a way of helping them get to the deep end without them even realizing it. I’m starting to think that the more I can camouflage deep, analytical thinking, the more successful it might be. Why not let students engage in criticizing elements of pop culture as long as the discourse can stay academic? More and more, people-who-know reiterate that the common core will be about what kids can do, not what they know. If a student can compare and analyze the depictions of womanhood in “Call Me, Maybe” and “You Oughta Know,” does it matter that the media isn’t classic literature?

                I’m also sure that I’ll keep adding to the answers to this dilemma as I watch more TIW’s. What’s amazing to me is how a community of learners can come together and inquire openly and help each other directly and indirectly.